Tuesday, May 02, 2023

Rainy Day Notes

Gratitudes:

1. I'm so grateful for the rain today.
2. I'm grateful 4 of my Nasturtium seeds are sprouting!
3. I'm grateful I did my Bible study first thing in the morning today.
4. I'm grateful for the inspiration of God. Looking forward to more of that.
5. I'm grateful for a cup of coffee.
Plan for the day:
1. Clean off my art desk.
2. Stay inside and stay warm.
3. Finish another book.
4. Create a watercolor picture in my sketchbook.
5. Rearrange art supplies.
Currently reading:
1. Medieval Woman, by Ann Baer
2. Hornblower During the Crisis, by CS Forester
3. An Eye For Art, by the National Gallery of Art
4. The Healing Light, by Agnes Sanford
5. Purpose in Prayer, by EM Bounds
6. Foxe's Book of Martyrs, by John Foxe

Here's how my day is going:

I woke up early after only three and a half hours of sleep. That is good. I've been waking up too late during the past few weeks. I need to start getting up early, early, early again because springtime is here and I need to water the garden and work on my art in the soon-to-be shed before noon. I think in the afternoons this summer it will be too hot to work in the shed and I'll have to come back to the trailer where I have an air conditioner. All good.

You can tell I'm really looking forward to that shed, right? Only a few more weeks now until my building dates. I need to prepare the ground more... the site where I want the shed isn't quite level. Also I'd like to get some gravel to put under it.

I'm really so happy my Nasturtium seeds have started to sprout. I planted those with Aurora's help about two weeks ago. I dug the holes and she put in the seeds and covered them. We worked great together. I put them in the three wooden barrel planters I bought from Amazon. We put three seeds in the smallest, four in the medium sized planter, and then five in the largest. So far we've got four seedlings. Right now they're being pounded by rain.

Monday, April 17, 2023

YouTube Community Response Discouragement

Gratitudes:

1. I'm grateful I was able to create this art... I call it My Leprechaun.
2. I am grateful for more rain today. It gives me a chance to rest indoors.
3. I am grateful I was able to work a little in the garden before the rain started. It should be raining the rest of the day.
4. I am grateful for my quiet time.
5. I am grateful for my Bible study time.
Plan for the day:
1. Read "The Lost One" - a short story by Mary Stewart.
2. Watch another episode of The Chosen.
3. Clear off my art desk. Then use it.
4. Listen to the raindrops falling on the roof of my travel trailer.
5. Talk on camera for five minutes. Maybe more.
Currently reading:
1. Bible: Psalm 75, Deuteronomy 10, Luke 7:11-17.
2. The Forest Feast, Mediterranean, by Erin Gleeson
3. The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children, by Stormie Omartian
4. A Passage to India, by E.M. Forster
5. The Healing Light, by Agnes Sanford
6. Life Lessons From James, by Max Lucado

Here's how my day is going:

I'm very happy with progress made on the side-yard transformation project. There's a lot more to be done. So far I've installed six bags of wood mulch and six bags of garden soil. There's a lot more left out in the van. Little by little, day by day. This is how I will get the work done.

Now I want to write about my video making hobby. I've been doing this for 9 years already. It is clear and apparent that I'm not successful at it. Many other Booktubers overlook my channel. I subscribe to them and watch their videos and leave nice comments. They do not reciprocate. Some do, but rarely. A few I see comments from regularly, like whenever I publish a video. But for the most part, they don't reciprocate and I put out a lot more energy and goodwill than I receive back.

It is discouraging after a while. I like the idea of extending goodwill and friendship gratis, but in practice, it wears me down. I've been doing this for nine years and still don't have 1000 subscribers. Many other, normally much younger people, have over 1000 subscribers and have only done this a year or two.

Obviously, I have not been able to create a successful or popular channel. I'm discouraged and feel like quitting. The only reason I don't is that this is my hobby and I still like to make videos. I just wish I could stop caring about community response.

Friday, April 14, 2023

My Garden Project 2023

Gratitudes:

1. I am grateful I'm finally getting some positive change to my yard. The wood mulch looks great!
2. I am grateful for putting Bible study first this morning. It always makes the day better.
3. I am grateful to have a new fountain pen journal.
4. I am grateful Jesus loves me.
5. I am grateful to have hope for a shed to be built here.
Plan for the day:
1. Gardening - continue installing wood mulch and new garden soil.
2. Boxes - continue breaking them down.
3. Come up with a plan for cutting away that elm tree growth.
4. Try moving the logs.
5. Take down the old greenhouse.
Currently reading:
1. The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children by Stormie Omartian
2. Lifting the Veil on the Lost Continent of Mu, by James & Jack Churchward
3. Clinging to Hope, by Charles R. Swindoll
4. Hornblower and the Atropos, by C.S. Forester
5. The Bible from 30,000 Feet, by Skip Heitzig
6. The Wind Off the Small Isles, by Mary Stewart

Here's how my day is going:

I'm very excited about the wood mulch! I've been looking forward to it for so long. To recap - I had a lot of annoying weeds in my side yard last year. This side yard is what I face when I walk out of my travel trailer (temporary home) each day. This year I want something nicer. I want to grow flowers and herbs.

This last Monday I drove to Medford and bought 20 bags of new organic potting soil plus 10 bags of brown wood mulch. I also got some concrete blocks and red concrete paving stones. The mulch is going down on the walkway in front of my washing machine. The potting soil will be distributed behind the trailer and nearby. These areas have been covered with cardboard most of the winter in preparation for this yard transformation and to keep us from slipping on mud. (I live in such a primitive situation right now.)

So yes, I'm excited I finally got to go get the gardening supplies I needed to complete the project. Of course, now that I have the soil and mulch I have to carry it out of the van and spread it on the ground. FYI I'm 70 years old now and very out of shape because almost all last year I had plantar fasciitis and couldn't walk without extreme foot pain. So working with these bags - moving them - is a big effort for me and I can do only a little bit at a time. It doesn't matter. I can complete this yard project in very short segments.

I have 1/2 acre here, and it all needs landscaping. All of it. However I recognize my limitations. I will have to do this work one tiny section at a time. It will take years - as many years as God gives me on this land. There will be no perfection but there will be slow progress and I'll have to be happy with that.

Tuesday, April 11, 2023

Recovery From Traveling

Gratitudes:
1. I'm grateful I got home from my journey to Medford/Yreka and back safely. Praise the Lord!
2. I'm grateful that my van runs well. No problems.
3. I'm grateful that I got all the things I needed at Home Depot.
4. I'm grateful that I got to order three new pairs of glasses. Yay!
5. I'm grateful that most of the day was sunny - until about 5:30pm.
Plan for the day:
1. My plan is to recover from yesterday.
2. I will try to unload some of what I bought yesterday - but those bags of soil may require more strength than I have.
3. I will work on my yard landscaping.
4. I will do another load of laundry. Laundry never ends.
5. I will just appreciate being home again. Really.

Currently reading:

1. An American Tragedy... now 67% through the 850+ page tome.
2. The Wind Off the Small Isles, by Mary Stewart, a novella.

Here's how my day is going:

I'm just tired. My muscles ache. My feet hurt. Traveling is so hard on me these days. That's probably why I stay home most of the time now.

 

Sunday, April 09, 2023

Resurrection Sunday and Blackberry Clipping Days

Gratitudes:
1. I am grateful for this Resurrection Sunday.
2. I am grateful for the Resurrection of Jesus Christ.
3. I am grateful that egg hunts are a different holiday. Same day, but different religion. (From ancient German traditions.)
4. I am grateful for H.E.S. and his young life. Thank you Jesus!
5. I am grateful to have done so much on my van clearing project, yesterday and the day before.
Plan for the day:
1. Pretty much the same as every Sunday.
2. I celebrate the Resurrection, but not Easter.
3. Prayer, Bible, Worship.
4. Reading of secular books.
5. Stay cheerful and look forward to tomorrow.
Currently reading:
1. Ireland
2. Bible From 30,000 Feet
3. The Golden Goblet
4. The Wind Off the Small Isles
5. Adventuring Through the Bible
6. Clinging to Hope

Here's how my day is going:

It is nice and warm in my trailer today. I think the freezing weather may be over until next winter. I always welcome the spring weather. It is great for a few weeks, until it gets too hot.

Yesterday I was out in the yard clipping away at the pervasive invasive brambles. The war is on. Again. 

Here's a video I made a few years ago on that topic:


Saturday, April 08, 2023

Van Cleaning Project

Gratitudes:
1. I'm grateful I got so much work done on cleaning out my van yesterday and earlier this morning.
2. I'm grateful A. helped me yesterday. She's so sweet!
3. I'm grateful to have this computer to write on.
4. I'm grateful for God Almighty loving me.
5. I'm grateful for a cup of tea.
Plan for the day:
1. Finish reading The Cloud of Unknowing.
2. Finish cleaning out the van. (Did a lot but not all yet.)
3. Read more books.
Currently reading:
1. Clinging to Hope by Charles R. Swindoll
2. The Cloud of Unknowing by an anonymous 13th century English monk
3. The Wind Off the Small Isles by Mary Stewart
4. Ireland, a Novel by Frank Delaney
5. The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children by Stormie Omartian
6. The Healing Light by Agnes Sanford

Here's how my day is going:

Today I'm continuing my work on cleaning out the van. Here's the story. 

About two years ago I was consulting with a man who wanted to build out my van into a camper van. We had all kinds of plans. I bought thousands of dollars worth of materials for this project, but unfortunately it all fell through because the man got fired from his job working for the tribe as a trailer repair specialist. He quit coming to my little forest town but I see him in Yreka from time to time. He still has the two solar panels we wanted to put on top of the van. I paid for them about a year ago but haven't picked them up yet because I haven't been to Yreka in almost a year and a half due to gas prices and my general happiness in just staying home these days.

Meanwhile the back of my van became a storage place for everything. I still have all the wood we were going to use in the van rebuild, sitting in the back of the van. Boxes and bins and junk went on top of that. Well, yesterday I removed the bins and most of the boxes. I stored some and tore down some cardboard boxes. Lots of work. Now today I have more boxes to tear down. Just empty boxes and trash! It all must go to the transfer station. Plus I have all that 8x4 lumber in the back of the van still. I will remove that today and set it on the ground covered by a tarp. Today. I will. Even if I have to do it single-handedly without any help from my neighbor, which I was hoping for. And when it is all done I'll sweep and mop the van floor.

All this is being done in part because I needed a van rescue (from clutter) and partly because next week I'm going to town to buy gardening supplies. I'm really looking forward to that.. but I need room in the back of the van for soil bags and a new ladder and those two solar panels my friend is storing at his home in Yreka. It will be so good to have an empty van again and to get started on my springtime gardening project!

Friday, April 07, 2023

Good Friday Musings on a Rainy Afternoon.

Gratitudes:

1. I'm grateful I'm still alive today.
2. I'm grateful it isn't raining right now. It was pouring for hours last night! (Not too long after I wrote this it started raining again.)
3. I'm grateful a new friend offered to pick up something at Costco for me today. I've never shopped at Costco and wouldn't know what to ask for, but I thought that was very kind of her! I just met her at the Bible study a few days ago.
4. I'm grateful for Jesus Christ. Today is Good Friday, anniversary of the day of His torture and crucifixion. It is mind-boggling to think of the pain He went through because of His love for us.
5. I'm grateful for being grateful, for having a generally positive attitude about life.
Plan for the day:
1. Van reorganization ✔
2. Laundry ✔
Currently reading:
1. Adventuring Through the Bible by Ray Stedman
2. Cloud of Unknowing by an anonymous 13th century English monk
3. An American Tragedy by Theodore Dreiser
4. Clinging to Hope by Charles R. Swindoll
5. The Bible From 30,000 Feet by Skip Heitzig
6. Lifting the Veil on the Lost Continent of Mu by James Churchward and Jack Churchward

Here's how my day is going:

The rain is back already. I need for it to go away so I can clean out my van before Sunday. Rain, rain, go away - come again some other day.

I feel better today than I did yesterday. Yesterday was a brain fog kind of day for me. Today I am sure I can get more done. Maybe this is because I remembered to take my hypothyroid medication last night.

I'm so looking forward to having that shed built next month. It will be my storage place, my office and my art studio. Too bad it will be single wall construction with no air conditioning, electricity or heating! I will survive. I can see myself getting up early to use my art studio before it gets too hot in the afternoon.

Today is Good Friday. Thank You Jesus for what you endured and did for us to save us from our sins. My heart is Yours.

Wednesday, April 05, 2023

Cooking Anxiety

Gratitudes:

1. I'm grateful to have a few new audiobooks to listen to.
2. I'm grateful for the day and evening to come.
3. I'm grateful to be alive and hopeful about the future.
4. I'm grateful for a box from Mindy.
5. I'm grateful for a new gardening idea.
Plan for the day:
1. Shop for potluck food. ✔
2. Plan trip to Oregon. ✔
3. Start collection of potluck recipes.
4. Do it now. Don't procrastinate. ✔
Currently reading:
1. Smith Wigglesworth on Healing
2. Clinging to Hope by Charles R. Swindoll

Here's how my day is going:

I'm feeling some anxiety about having a potluck dinner to go to. I thought it was going to be just a Bible study but then was told all their Bible studies start with a potluck dinner. It is a great idea, except for someone like me with cooking anxiety. I can usually hide this pretty well but this time it really got to me as I am also dealing with a bad kitchen situation. I live in a small travel trailer. I have never been able to light the oven here, and the refrigerator is broken so no freezer, though I do have a small chest type refridgerator that I originally bought for my van.

There was a discussion of food via text messages and I confessed my anxiety to people some of whom are complete strangers to me. The Bible says, "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard you..." (Philippian 4:6-7) however it is hard to break a lifelong anxiety. I usually handle it well but this thing about not having full use of a kitchen kind of threw me off.